Guest Post: Charles de la Puss

(cross-posted from Charlie's catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/270662)

I have purr-suaded The Woman to help me type this entry- it's the LEAST she could do after so many months of blatant neglect. OK, TECHNICALLY the least she could do would be nothing, but she would pay dearly for that in the form on even more ignoring than she usually gets, and perhaps Gus' hairballs redirected into her shoes. Am also planning on forcing her to post this message to her own blob so that person who reads it (whoever that fool is!) will know that SHE IS NEGLECTING THE CREATIVE EXPRESSION OF A POOR, POOR PUSS.

Anyways, things are purrty good other than that. We live in something called a "Noova Skoosha" now. It was cold when we moved here, and then it was snowy for a long time, but at least we have nice, big windows to look out of. I was excited to learn that we were going to have a "back duck"- turns out a "deck" is not the same thing, but sometimes there are FRIKKIN' HUGE black birds out there, anyway. Also teeny brown ones on the feeder.

Gus and go outside now sometimes. At first I was scared to leave the "deck", but now I prowl through the grass and stalk birds. I have to say, there's a world of difference between mice and birds! I'm a champion mouser, but I haven't yet been able to present a dead birdie to The Man to gain his favour. The grass is getting long out there, though, and I often have to *boing-boing-boing* over it when it tickles my belly. Then The People all laugh at me.

The Man now wears funny clothes to Work and drives a strange car when he goes there. Also, he has a gun, so I tend to keep my mouth shut when he's going to Work. Otherwise, I'm pretty much still all over him, but he claims he does not love me, and that I am "dead to him". BUT there was this one time when I was being really "pathetic" (HIS word, not mine!) and rubbing on the coffee table, and he scooped me onto the couch and rubbed my belly. HEAVEN!

The Childrens are getting bigger. I don't see them a lot during the day, since I've pretty much claimed the basement as my terror-tory, but The Baby is now walking, and he chases Gus around sometimes to hug him and/or bite his tail. Litttle freak.

I have to go nap now- WHAT, Woman? She gives me the dirtiest looks when I'm napping... or contemplating napping... she also gets mad when I wake her up at 4 in the morning, when I say, "YOOOOOWLLLL?"People are SO weird.I am considering highjacking her blob on a weekly basis. This would approximately triple "her" frequency of posting. I'm a better writer than she is, anyway.

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WOMN! ware are yoo goign!? git bak here and tipe fur me, dammit!1

o darn.